Steve Arnott, quietly celebrating an (in)-significant birthday 6th July 2019. Much love from J&Jxx.
ISCHIA ISLAND, Bay of Naples, self-contained apartments, pool, attractive garden, 07861 821742
This is a great round the world: UK India Nepal Thailand Singapore Bali 3 stops in Australia Queenstown Auckland Fiji USA UK Economy from £1795 Premium from £3295 Business from £6999 ATOL IATA 02077045700 www.roundtheworldflights.com
Girlfriend in a coma? I know, I know, "Ophelia Is Also Dead" Edfringe19 bit.ly/OpheliaIsAlsoDead
Torquay, two-bedroom flat with parking. Sea/harbour views. Ideal for ftb, investor, holiday home or rental. £140k. email@example.com
HOUSE AND GITE IN SOUTHWEST FRANCE with pool and large garden. www.redpepperrides.com
Loire / Maison Des Vignerons-Ecueille / 3 floors. Garden, cellar, shops. £40,000
Two Bedroom, two bath 1st floor flat for sale Islington - walk to pubs, shops and tube. £785K. For information call 020 7900 6909
Aerotoxic - The Asbestos of the Skies. Experienced Ghost-writer required to partner new book to expose the aviation industry’s ‘Dirty little secret’ cover-up, which affects the health of both aircrew and passengers. John.firstname.lastname@example.org 0777 3771867
DNA results discover family. Help fund book to support others. www.gofundme.com/journey-of-discovery-and-book-publishing
Lost job, home next, Brexit - Please help? 23-05-80 28534949
Couple mid 70s nest egg scammed, devastated with no one to turn to, Grateful for any help. 54-41-00 43261752
Dating 4 Grown Ups Private client consultations & dating introductions for the over 40s with no upper age limit. Please contact David, who is 'Matchmaker Extraordinary'. London/South East & East Anglia 01728 635064 or 07986 213120 www.dating4grownups.co.uk
Attractive, independent woman (30) seeking male 30-45 for love, companionship and adventure. Cambridge/Suffolk area. email@example.com
Yes, you can now come direct to a Barrister. Ring 020 7833 9625 or 07850 629 298 firstname.lastname@example.org
HAVE YOU BEEN LET DOWN BY YOUR SOLICITORS OR ARE YOU INVOLVED IN A DISPUTE? Then contact Bloomsbury Law, specializing in all aspects of Litigation, Tax Disputes, Employment, Family Law, Negligence, and Property Disputes. www.bloomsbury-law.com, 020 7998 7777. No Legal Aid.
Facing Prison? Need self and family informative pre-sentence support? Need to know your rights inside? www.easyjail.co.uk 07444 547294
Thinking Twats' T-shirts Torso-enhancing t-shirts from: www.thinkingtwatstshirts.co.uk
OLD CARS - Cash paid NATIONWIDE. Condition unimportant. Also valuation services. Tel John 07375 318588 Email: email@example.com
Tobacciana, Breweriana, Man Cave Décor - www.ebay.co.uk/str/brewerianacollectables
PRIVATE EYE ISSUES 280-1499 (1972-2019) 1214 copies. Offers £. firstname.lastname@example.org
THE DOCTOR - HOW IT WORKS - Chlamydia, management idiocy and Death all feature in this hilarious book about doctors and the NHS. Full colour illustrations, by Dr Nigel McHale, A&E Consultant. Buy on Amazon.
The Big Hippo Guide to Democracy, Referendums, Elections (And All That) by prizewinning Guardian cartoonist Martin Rowson and Bob Marshall Andrews. What you need in Brexit Britain to keep your flag flying and madness at bay. A perfect gift. Buy from Amazon or Waterstones.
Open To Doubt The hilarious new book of bizarre short stories by Marcus Achison. Troubador and Amazon.
A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH by Barbara Rogers. Women worldwide need contraception. Challenge the fundamentalists! £9.99 from bookshops and Amazon
Screenwriter seeks good plot premise for feature film, TV drama or comedy. Will write on part fee, part royalty share basis. 07946 420429
Lasting Powers of Attorney. Home visits nationwide www.lpanow.com 0345 230 0010
Find Anybody - Worldwide Beneficiaries - Fraud - Lost Family 07773 788389 Email: email@example.com www.jamesblackesq.com James Black LL. B. Solving cases here since 1994
SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE IN THREE DAYS Glowing testimonials. www.therapyretreats.com
Want to raise your profile? Speaking engagements, TV news appearances? www.ceo-pr.com
Daren't Google Yourself? Get rid of bad search results. Fast, fixed fee cleanup. www.online-reputation.repair
Publicity for your book. Top publicity for your book or eBook to all press, book reviewers, Radio/TV book shows, online and book bloggers. Just £195. www.prforbooks.co.uk 020 7692 0707
Speech looming? Relax, I'll write it for you. Don't waste time worrying. Lawrence 020 8245 8999 www.greatspeechwriting.co.uk
WORRIED ABOUT BEING AN EXECUTOR? We can relieve you of the burden, and give you all the help you want: whether it's just obtaining the grant of probate for you, or dealing with the whole process all the way through to production of final estate accounts. We are Probaters. Call 0845 034 7344 or check our website www.probaters.com
Been Scammed? A Victim of Crime? Contact Carlton Huxley Ltd Legal & Law Enforcement Consultants. Evidence Gathering for Criminal & Civil Litigation. Tel 020 3239 5076 firstname.lastname@example.org www.carltonhuxley.com
HENRY HERBERT TAILORS. Bespoke Suitmakers. Made in England. Visit us: WC1R 4RG. www.henryherbert.com 020 7837 1452
Grey Pound Ltd Responsible Equity Release For Any Purpose. www.greypound.co.uk
CHIEF EXECUTIVE? Transform your loneliness and stress at the top into career success. Call today: Roger E Jones (INSEAD alum, HBR published), The CEOs Coach +44 7711 763979 Email: email@example.com
COUNSELLING FOR ADULT CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLICS In person, Skype, Facetime. firstname.lastname@example.org 01225 330007
FEDORA INVESTIGATIONS "Real support when you need it" If you or your company have been a victim of a fraud, scam or financial injustice which involves possible wrongdoing. Contact Fedora on: Business: 0800 044 3658 (24 hours) Website: www.fedorainvestigations.com
Choosing a broadband provider: more difficult than choosing a party leader - they all seem terrible!... and the broadband providers aren't much better! Fortunately there is an alternative: Andrews & Arnold. Visit www.aa.net.uk/eye4